cleaning up her act
(posted from my phone)
perhaps I always suspected if I did not know that she had a
substance abuse problem
she had all the classic signs although I thought when I met
her she had already overcome most of them specially the rumors of cocaine
the problem is that at the end of her time in our little
county she was associated with some of the most provocative Mobsters apparently
and where Mobsters go so this abusive of substance
a recent post saying that she is now 3 years clean says a
lot about her determination to make a new life for herself although what
surprises me is I thought she had overcome these issues back in 2016 rather
than 2021
her move out of the county to Manhattan and a prestigious
job on Union square seem to be extreme positive sign that she had turned her
life around now from our latest post it is clear she's still struggled and
wasn't until she made her Way South where she managed to pull the pieces
together into some sort of positive mosaic
the fact that she is saying this now is remarkable since she
is someone who has kept her secrets very well and someone who has been
determined to survive
I keep thinking of that poem she posted a few weeks before
her resignation from the Virgin mayors enclave when she said she was tempted to
do herself in but her will to survive out weighted at all
she is obviously working very hard at making her life
positive again and the fact that she is revealing so much again says a lot
about that progrress
meanwhile I have to wonder what her goals are now she seems
incredibly content with her weekly or more often rides in the country a kind of
symbiotic relationship with an animal that he could not get with human beings
as sneaky as animals can be they are not nearly as sneaky as
human beings can be or mean and what they do is generally reaction to what they
perceive their masters want or are and since she appears to be kindhearted the
relationship tends to be kind as well
at the end of all of this you have to wonder what she is
looking for now where she wants to go what she wants to do or is she merely
content to do what she's doing now and feel that immense joy that comes from
finding peace in these kinds of environments
whatever it is she appears to be opening up again the way
she did over the summer of 2013 when she revealed more about herself then she
ever had before in public
how far this will go is anybody's guess and what inspired it
I suppose we are coming back to that point of communication
that I always suspect it happened back when we were at odds with each other
this kind of honesty hidden behind the mask of her poetry only there's no
poetry now and what she posts seems to be much more revealing and open without
the metaphors
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