Achieving happiness finally Feb. 8, 2025
My one-time best friend and co-editor of our underground literary magazine from back in the 1980s once claimed some artists do not come into their own until after the age of 40 (or 50), while others get their glory while young, often dying young or burning out later.
He might have come up with this theory because he had
plunged into his 30s and still had not yet made a dent in the literary world,
despite betting accolades throughout his early life, teachers in elementary
school singing his praises, teachers in high school claiming he would become
the next great poet.
Despite my skepticism, he may be right about some of it.
Some people simply find happiness later in life that had eluded them when they
were young.
Perhaps the joy is greater for having been forced to wait
for it for so long. I would not know since I’ve not achieved greatness when
young or when old.
I miss the struggle from back when I assumed I would achieve
something, those days when I lived in a cold water flat and scribbled in
notebooks, assuming someone would later appreciate my genius (or lack of it), a
time when the world seemed hopeful, the process more important than the
outcome.
I still scribble in notebooks, but more in an attempt to look
back and preserve what once was, rather than what I presumed would come later.
There isn’t much later to be had.
Happiness is a subjective thing, but often more important
than recognition, and getting something finally that you’ve wanted all your
life, may be the real achievement of a life time.
Sometimes that’s all there is, and all that needs to be.
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